i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
im about as happy as oj after his trial
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
