I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
She tied me up with her honor cords...
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize