somebody snuck up and got me drunk
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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