this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
