you turned your livingroom into a bong?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize