How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
