I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
