Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I need to wash the frat house off of me
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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