Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
