You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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