"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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