I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
