Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
a search helicopter?!
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
