I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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