Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
