I met the friendliest cop last night
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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