she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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