i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You dont lie about slip and slides
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize