I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
