NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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