i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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