i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
what day is it and did you see me today?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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