yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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