my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
