So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize