Can i not drive my cunt home
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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