I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
