Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
