nut hugger
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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