Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
