Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
