If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
