Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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