Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
