Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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