You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
