That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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