there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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