You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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