a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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