did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
