Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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