Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize