Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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