We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize