real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
