Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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