today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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