you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
