just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
