He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
