no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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