i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
