summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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